To the people this may concern (and should and probably does concern):

Let me get some things straight here…I feel that I have been terribly misleading to several of you on matters and I am very sorry about that. I never meant to be misleading and I thought that I was clear on how I felt, but obviously not. I am so sorry for this horrible misunderstanding.
I could have stopped this all a lot sooner if I had just been more discerning and had taken initiative, but I thought (and hoped) it would all just go away. I tend to live in my own world-in an alternate reality and I try to pretend that the real world is not there for me. I try to pretend that the world does not notice me. I prefer to be in my own world where everything is simple and it never changes.
Please forgive me for getting you all hurt and mixed up in this. I never meant for this all to happen. I never wanted this to happen. I am so sorry.

FIRST OFF: I am NOT in love with anyone and I have no romantic feelings for anyone at this time. I have not met anyone that fulfills my qualifications that God has laid on my heart to look for in a man. I have not met anyone who measures up to my ‘yard stick’ and I will not even consider someone until they measure up to that. Point blank.

NEXT: God has told me to follow my parents lead not matter what. I am going to do that, even if it doesn’t make since. That is my calling. I am going to trust my parents that they know what they are doing in this matter. And above all, I am going to trust God that He has got them on the right course and that He has got this under control. I am going to trust Him to heal the hurts of others as well. Sorry if that offends you, but that is what I am doing. I cannot go any other way but God’s way. I feel that this is all people’s #1 calling from God to begin with. Not just honoring their parents, but staying under their GOD GIVEN authority and obeying their parent’s wishes, trusting God that He has it under control. If people seriously did this more often there would be a lot less pain and heartache in the world today…

FURTHERMORE: I would greatly appreciate it if people would not poke, prod, push, or ‘suggest’, (in other words) TEASE about a young man and me again. It may be fun for both parties for a while, but it is not later. If you would like to approach me about it respectfully and maturely or if I ask for a suggestion from someone, then please give me your honest opinion and some Scripture, but otherwise, please, don’t be like “Oh did you see so-and-so did this for you?” and “Oooooooh! I think so-and-so likes you!!!” and so on. I am just as guilty as anybody else for this, and I have and am beating myself up for it…I am sorry that I encouraged you in any way on any of this and I purpose to never act as such again. I myself will try to present such a matter mature like from now on.

ANOTHER THING: Life is not about making ME happy…that goes for everybody. It is not just “oh, but I feel…” “But I want…” “Oh I need…” “Well I think…” NO! That is not what we were put on earth for. I feel that all of us have been a little inconsiderate of the other people around us who are ‘not involved’ in this, because they ARE affected by it. Our siblings and our friends are important factors. They may not seem affected by what is happening in OUR lives, but they are. My sister has been very, VERY hurt by all this that is happening and has happened, and I know for a fact that there are other siblings being affected by this. We need to stop and think about someone other than ourselves and the person we ‘love’…because there are others in this life that deserves attention. Not just us and OUR ‘lovely dear one’….

FINALLY: I am going to be completely open with my parents about everything from now on. If you wish to tell me something confidential in a conversation, I can tell my parents that it is ‘classified’ and they will understand, but everything else I am going to be open about. No secrets, no ‘my conversation’, and no “don’t tell your mom about this…”. I am sorry if some of you think this is ‘sacrileges’ but I’m doing it anyway. I don’t like my parents being left in the dark on things, and they don’t like it either. They can’t fulfill their GOD GIVEN responsibility of protecting me if I leave them in the dark all the time, and God can’t work through them or through me if we have this wall between us and this darkness in our lives. This seriously should go for everybody.

I am sorry that all this mess happened and I am sorry about the hearts that were hurt in all this. I suggest that we all start focusing on what we should be focusing on: God and the family He gave us before our lover…He gave us our families for a reason…find out what that reason is! If we had all done that in the beginning, a lot of this mess wouldn’t even be!

God bless you all and may you only grow closer to Him through this.
I love each and every one of you,
Kathryn